This morning the doorbell rang, and there was an unexpected delivery to be signed-for. How exciting! - perfect timing, too - a surprise parcel, just as we are starting to feel a bit flat after the greedy excesses of Christmas.
Well, I have to explain that the Contesse occasionally dabbles in online competitions, and (being far smarter than the average bear), has a pretty impressive success rate - I shall not bore you with details, but I promise you would be impressed if I were to do so...
Anyway, it seems that she recently entered a sponsored competition to win an iPad, and this parcel was very obviously just such a thing.
Sadly, it wasn't - she had won a runner-up prize for said competition, which is a self-assembly, punched card doughnut stand - the main purpose of such a device is obviously to further the commercial presence of Krispy Kreme (of whom I have never heard, so it stands to reason they must be market leaders), but I can see it would be pretty useful to have a purpose-built gizmo for keeping one-dozen of KK's splendid products out of the heap of pizza boxes and Coke tins which might be expected to adorn our festive board.
Strangely, my heart is not uplifted. The stand comes without donuts, of course, and I understand that it retails for £4.45. I guess I'm not really a donut man - I feel the device will come in handy for lighting the log stove. However, I was sufficiently intrigued to look up Krispy Kreme on Google. It seems that (of course) they are a very big deal indeed, and are even capable (in the US, at least) of catering for corporate functions or weddings (have a look here). I suddenly have a wonderful vision of crowds of gargantuan rednecks at a wedding, cheering as a convoy of smart Krispy Kreme trucks delivers the high point of the big day.
Now I'm really depressed.
Luckily we seem to have managed to stop them at the border. Not sure why they call them doughnuts, they have little in common with the resl thing. Still, if you redo the topper and fill it with cucumber sandwiches, scones and Fairy Cake I'm sure this would do admirably for afternoon tea.
ReplyDeleteI wish you and your family and mother the best possible New Year,
Gerrit on eBay!
ReplyDeleteKK doughnuts - no thanks, but I'll have Greggs' glazed ring doughnuts, the confectionary with a great taste and a mildly pornographic title too!
A very happy New Year to you all, and especially mum!
I can almost feel your disappointment - the ipad pic really had me going there.
ReplyDeleteI suppose it could used as some sort of objective in a game...no scrub that, firelighters are best option.
Down here in London, there is a small chain of bakeries named Percy Ingle, whose Danish Ring cake should be far better known, I feel. Happy New Year to all!
ReplyDeleteI'm not as embarrassed as I probably should be to say that I always rather liked them; before they joined the ever expanding list of things that I'm forbidden to eat on medical grounds. Possibly it's because they have a store right next to IKEA in Leeds and it's a good place to escape to when the combination of crowds and Billy bookcases get too much. However, I'm not sure the experience would have been particularly enhanced by the goods being displayed on a cardboard stand.
ReplyDeleteAnother good laugh Tony, thank you :) I must say the Christmas Jumper post was a belter, particularly the explanatory photographs! Luckily I don't have a sweet tooth and have never heard of this company (I'm a savoury man). I think Ross' afternoon tea idea is splendid.
ReplyDeleteBring back the Tiger Tank slippers?
Doughnuts. Not a patch on a decent scone or gurr cake.
ReplyDeleteThank you, gentlemen - doughnuts get mixed press, obviously. I did go ahead with my plan to burn the KK stand, but it had the last laugh - one of the big flat pieces curled in the heat, and some strange, varnish-like fluid ran down the inside of the stove glass, baking to a hard, black finish which will probably require a craft-knife blade to remove.
ReplyDeleteThe cunning fiends.