Napoleonic, WSS & ECW wargaming, with a load of old Hooptedoodle on this & that


Monday 9 August 2021

Hooptedoodle #402 - International Trade after Brexit; Your Call Is in a Queue

 A couple of weeks ago, I arranged for a package to be sent from Germany. Since there are concerns about the increased likelihood of loss of or damage to goods entering the UK during our "settling in" period, I arranged for the shipment to be fully insured, and for all paperwork, and the package itself, to show the full value clearly.


Sure enough, on Friday I received a letter from Parcel Force's Edinburgh depot, explaining that they were holding a parcel from overseas for me, and that I would have to pay Import VAT of £55 and a handling charge of £12 before they could deliver.

Righto - that's what I was expecting. I went online, on Friday (6th Aug), paid the charge and was offered a calendar to choose a delivery date, there being an additional £12 charge for Saturday deliveries. I swerved the Saturday offering, and arranged for delivery for Monday 9th - that's today, in fact. So I can sit and wait for my parcel to arrive.


Well, maybe. If I check with the Parcel Force Worldwide tracking page for my parcel (above), it tells me that my package is held, pending payment of import charges - this has been the status since 3rd August. If I phone to ask whether it is on its way to me, I get a completely automated service - one of the countless options tells me that my parcel is held pending payment of charges; another option tells me that the charges have already been paid.

I searched in vain for a number which might get me though to a human being. At one point I was offered the chance to speak to a customer service desk, and was presented with a long preamble about how my call might be recorded for training purposes, and that Parcel Force's staff are key workers, and they have the right to expect to be treated with dignity and respect. Eventually a phone started to ring, and then I got irritating music, interspersed with repeating messages about the many shipping services they offer, and how my call was in a queue.

You know what? I'm really not as daft as I may seem. I think it would be possible to spend a very long time in this queue, because I don't think the customer service numbers get answered, especially in the current (predictable) shambles which our departure from Europe has spawned. They leave it to the robots. There may or may not be any key workers present in the customer service area - it makes little difference.

Will my parcel arrive today? Has some decent person at the Edinburgh Parcel Force depot stuck it on the wagon, since the charges have been paid, and since they have promised me delivery today? If they have, why haven't they updated the tracking system?

This is only slightly inconvenient - if the parcel arrives then that's fine - if it doesn't arrive, then I have to change some plans for the rest of the week. Not a big deal - presumably it will arrive eventually. If I had paid the extra 12 quid for the Saturday delivery I'd be really rather cross, though, eh?

I was told by a friend in Germany that his business was looking at buying some equipment recently, and they chose American kit because doing any trade with the UK at the moment is a bureaucratic nightmare. I do hope his impression is not typical.

I shall get myself a mug of tea and read for a bit, keeping an eye on the lane. I am quite a fan of Parcel Force - they have always done a good enough job for me, notwithstanding my occasional rants, and I believe that they will not pretend they have been here, or that I wasn't in. The fact that their online tracking record is wrong is quite a shaker, really...

***** Very Late Edit *****

Parcel finally delivered safely on 12th August - no damage. Delay would appear to be caused by procedures for recording payment of import charges being swamped. If the coin-counters would only tell them, the shipping people would deliver. 

I sent in a pro-forma enquiry on 10th - entry requires the Parcel No (which I supplied). I now have a reply, which says they cannot help me, since I didn't supply the Tracking No (which I wasn't asked for, and which is different). Someone, apparently, will be in touch in 3 working days - now that's strangely familiar.

I'm really happy to have received my parcel, but very disappointed with Parcel Force's bizarre concept of "Customer Experience" - maybe things will improve. A Customer Experience without the option of speaking to a human employee smacks of not treating the customers with dignity and respect, but I guess that's the way we are heading.

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27 comments:

  1. Well its gone three in the afternoon - not looking good is it?

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    1. No - it never arrived. This morning the tracker page still shows the import charges unpaid. My guesses are:
      (1) being British, we will have instituted a crazy admin system for international postage, and we will now find it is unmanageable, and we will be shocked, and we will whine about it - this is a great gift
      (2) the people who handle the taxes and the handling charges are badly overloaded, and have a mighty backlog - the actual shipping people are attempting to work in the way they used to, but no-one has noticed that someone is standing on the pipe
      (3) the more you automate a service or an industry, the less time it takes for any humans still involved to forget how things work, or why they are there
      (4) none of this is intended to undermine the dignity and respect with which I regard the key workers - it goes without saying

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  2. afraid i'm not a fan of Parcel Force as several times in past they failed to find my home even though i'm on a main road and they have to pass home every day to deliver in town, had to go to local Post office/depot to collect parcels!! had no problems getting items from Spain by airmail

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    1. I have to say PF have been pretty good over the years. Maybe my German parcel could have travelled by DHL instead?

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  3. I do hope it arrives today for you Tony, very frustrating all this. Seeing that Parcelforce logo reminded me of two fairly recent experiences involving them, first a very large box of 40mm painted soldiers that I sent to Graham C that arrived looking as though it had been kicked around the floor (I made the mistake of sticking a couple of 'Fragile' stickers on it) and the second was a box containing 1000 15mm painted soldiers to Australia that simply disappeared off the tracking radar for well over a week until it suddenly arrived at the destination, with practically every base of figures bent despite my careful packing. Luckily there was not a single broken bayonet, they all bent back into shape, but I nearly had a cardiac arrest when I saw the photos! Decided never to use Parcelforce again. Fingers crossed for you.

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    1. I now have an automated email that acknowledges receipt of my pro-forma enquiry, and promises someone will contact me within 3 working days. Maybe they will, but we are still all bloody well doomed, aren't we?

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  4. Nearly 5 now, so I guess it’s a no go.

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    1. I sadly stopped ordering 1:600 ships from a smashing Spanish company because of the problems on delivery.
      I’m told that after WW2 It was hard to find someone who’d admit to having voted for the NSDAP. My prediction is that in 10 yrs time you’ll be hard pressed to find someone who voted for Brexit.

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    2. Let's not spread the subject matter too wide, but the farming community here are waiting to see whether Boris's shiny new plan to get all our food from Australia and New Zealand (how will that impact the environment, by the way?) is really just a cunning plan to get the UK farmers off his back and allow him to tell them to get stuffed. The industry of middle-men who have sucked all the profit out of food production here will be able to shift seamlessly to the new arrangements. You know it makes sense.

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  5. I believe the done thing these days is to not blame the dreaded b word for all these irritating inconveniences but just pretend it’s all some weird unfortunate cosmic occurrence! :p

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    1. Good point. I suspect that the official done thing is to blame Johnny Foreigner - always was, really!

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  6. I recently received a package from the US. It took the scenic route leaving Oklahoma it went via Tulsa to Chicago. It spent 2 weeks in Chicago before heading off to San Francisco and then to Sydney. In all it took 2 months to reach me but arrived with no Customs charges or handling fee. The USPS online tracker still shows it as leaving Sydney.

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    1. In a weird way, this all reminds me of a peculiar period in my working life when suddenly everything was controlled by The Data Dictionary. There was the real world, where we all lived, and then there was what the Data Dictionary said about the real world, which was what all decisions were based on. The two versions, of course, never were very similar, a characteristic which became more noticeable when the real people realised that they got onto less trouble and received less hassle if they didn't bother telling the Dictionary people about changes. Parcel tracking systems will sink into the dust through neglect - why should delivery staff maintain a rod to beat their own backs?

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  7. I hope your parcel did arrive. I heard Richard Clarke talking about the difficulties of shipping his products to the EU. Fortunately post from the UK to Canada seem largely unaffected by Brexit.

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    1. No sign of it yet, Mike. Not to worry - I guess it will turn up eventually, and if I get upset about it they have scored extra points. More tea required, and I shall get back to my James Falkner book. Perhaps a scone...?

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  8. Tony hope it’s resolved soon, I had the exact same issue as Mark with a parcel I’d ordered from America going to Australia first etc. The only problem I’ve ever had with parcel force was a ‘discussion ‘ I had with an admin staff member over where I lived! Despite the parcel (from America) displaying my correct address someone in parcel force had put the incorrect house number on their system. They’re not allowed to change it and I was bluntly told it had to be delivered to the address on their system! Fortunately the delivery driver knew it was wrong and brought it to me. After I’d spent the morning trying to explain to the old lady down the road she was getting a parcel for me! The joys of the modern age!

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    1. Hi Graham - downward spiral? Probably more of a helix? I have screen-prints of all the confirmations of scheduled delivery details (now out of date, of course), payment of fees, everything. Address and everything else correct, and you will be delighted to know that the import charges left my bank account instantly, no delay at all, though I'm sure they will be bouncing around between accounts on the Dark Side somewhere.

      I guess that shopping overseas may become one of the things I don't do any more, like using eBay. This is the 21st Century, after all. I shall relax, and enjoy our blessed Sovereignty.

      I wonder how Charles I is doing these days?

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  9. Have you tried Twitter @parcelforce contact them direct as they really dont like public humiliation

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    1. Drew - thanks for this - I read this somewhere else too. I do not have a Twitter a/c, as a matter of principle, so am snookered by my own petard (that doesn't seem right?) at present.

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  10. Schrodinger’s package! How lucky you are to have a mail system so devoted to testing philosophical concepts!

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    1. Love it! Thank you Ivan. You've also reminded me of one of my favourite old jokes, about Heisenberg and Schrödinger driving through Los Angeles...

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    2. “Roll dice for it?” Einstein asks. Always good to roll dice.

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    3. Good! Like it! You will probably know it, but the Heisenberg & Schrödinger joke is:

      H & S are visiting Los Angeles, when they are stopped by traffic cops. One cop says, "Do you guys know how fast you were travelling?"

      Heisenberg replies, "No - but we know exactly where we are".

      "You were doing 52 mph" says the cop.

      "Oh, that's great," says H, "now we're lost".

      The other cop is checking the trunk [boot in UK] of the car, and he says, "Do you know there's a dead cat in here?"

      "We do now!" replies Schrödinger.

      Actually, it isn't as funny as I remembered...

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    4. No, it is funny, just nerdy. My version has Einstein in the car too. Maybe you should share it with your ParcelForce driver, when they turn up?

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  11. Ordered some Vallejo spray paints from Poland ... hadn't realised it as the ad was in £s... so thought it was a UK firm, too late to change.

    Cans arrived today - no problems or issues, just a normal delivery!

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    1. That's reassuring. There's a lot of hidden geography in online shopping these days, and suddenly it matters. I recently bought some office-equipment type materials from Amazon, free postage and everything, and the shipment arrived 3 weeks later from China. Nothing in the ad suggested this would happen. I am very wary of Marketplace traders on Amazon now!

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  12. I live in Belgium. I used to order quite a lot from the UK, but haven't done so since Jan 1 (with one exception). I decided to wait out all the transitions till the dust has settled, and started looking more towards EU-based manufacturers. I'm still wondering what the small-scale wargaming business will look like in a year or so.

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