Tuesday, 31 January 2012
Hooptedoodle #42 - Working Definition of a Crock
Only in theory. My netbook is a humble little thing, and it only gets used a couple of times a month, which means that, when it gets switched on, the first thing that happens is that a fortnight's backlog of Windows updates and McAfee antivirus updates and Adobe updates and Java upgrades all get jammed in the revolving door. Given the sparse broadband service we get here, this is all enough to prevent anything sensible being available online for quite a long time - sometimes longer than the battery capacity of the computer. Yes, yes - you are right - I should have set everything up an hour or two earlier, but - you know what? - in this age of supposed digital convenience it's kind of infuriating that I should have to do that. Anyway, I attempt to get the commentary for the game, and wait a very, very long time. A quick squint at Windows Task Manager shows me that Internet Explorer is getting no processor time at all, because it's behind McAfee in the bloody queue - a situation which persists for another 10 minutes, at which point I shut the stupid thing down.
Death by security. Muttering gently, I give up on the siege guns for tonight, and retire to the trusty desktop computer in my office to listen to the match online. I wonder, in my unfocused way, what kind of a cataclysmic virus attack would be required to waste more time and cause more annoyance in total than McAfee does, drip by drip, every single day. Yes, I have to be grateful that my internet service provider gives me free use of McAfee's wonderful product, but sometimes it's hard to remember what a blessing this is. The one bright note is that at least I don't have Norton any more.
Like riding a bicycle through porridge.