Napoleonic & ECW wargaming, with a load of old Hooptedoodle on this & that


Monday 10 September 2018

Donkey Award: Snake Sabres - a short digital digression

A few years ago, I saw mention of the fact that someone had developed a mod for a dice-rolling app on a smart-phone, so you could play Commands & Colors using your phone instead of Stone Age dice. Apart from a faint feeling of weary revulsion at the time, I did nothing more than make a mental note that the human species had achieved this further landmark in our technological evolution.

I was thinking idly about this the other day, and recalling that I had (luckily, perhaps?) never seen an example of this fine thing subsequently. I Googled, as one does, and found this thread on the user website, which seems once to have included a picture of the smartphone app doing its C&CN thing, but the picture has now gone missing.

Photograph missing - this is not the original missing photo, of course, it is another one
Well, it goes without saying, I don't actually care a button [perhaps "couldn't give a toss" would be more apt?], but this has piqued my interest again. My personal view is that the use of the actual, physical dice in the game (rather than an app) is a good thing, since

(1) it provides an element of much-needed exercise

(2) it gives a rare opportunity to switch the damned smartphone off and put it back in one's pocket, which is just the sort of reason we might play C&CN in the first place. [Even better, put the smartphone beneath the visitor's rear tyre, on the driveway.]

I am confident that some worthies will use this phone app and think that the game is all the better for it, and I can only say bless them, so I do not wish to mock or condemn anyone here, but if it was such a raging success, why can't I find a photo anywhere?

Anyone got a link to a picture of this app? If so, I'll be grateful and vaguely interested. If not, especially if this is because the whole idea was dropped as a stupid affectation, then I may even have a glass of the old Pinot Grigio with my dinner. How can I lose?

In a vague sort of way I am reminded of a walk I did along Hadrian's Wall six years ago, when one of my companions was in a sweat every evening trying to find somewhere to re-charge his iPhone, since he had a compass app on it. The idea of a flat phone battery resulting in our getting dangerously lost on a walk where you can either go east or west at any moment was too awful to contemplate, but fortunately I (secretly) had a small device in my pocket which used a magnetized steel pointer on a round dial to show the direction, so we were probably safe enough.

Oh yes - the title of this post is an insiders' joke term for the dice roll you need to kill a General in C&C. What fun we have, when you think about it. Since this post is a bit short of visuals, here is the house Donkey Award logo, to make the point.


16 comments:

  1. Have I been playing CCA wrong all of these years? Leaders are killed on either a single Leader roll or double Leader rolls depending on the situation.

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    1. I haven't actually played CCA, but that sounds like the same rule. In CCN, if a Leader is attached to a unit which takes losses, a roll of two combat dice which produces a pair of cross-sabres symbols will eliminate him. If he is attached to a unit which is itself eliminated then you just roll a single die, and if that comes up cross-sabres then he's a goner. There's also another rule for Leaders who are targeted on their own-io in melee (or, as a result of recent rule changes, by missile fire) - but this happens so infrequently that I always have to look it up when it does.

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  2. At the risk of being branded a Luddite, I don't want a cellphone or any other sort of digital device anywhere near my gaming table. Give me the ol' bones every time (I have over 100 D6's). Too much of our life is governed already by the bells and whistles of personal electronic devices. I certainly don't want that during my hobby time, which at its core is about the art and craft of the model soldier. A slower, more civilized, and more aesthetically pleasing form of enjoyment.

    Best Regards,

    'Ludd' (aka Stokes)

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    1. Well said sir. LOL (only kidding).

      Apart from your admirable policy on cellphones, I am a little alarmed about the dice collection. Come on, Stokes, that sounds like a bit of a problem - you don't really need 100 D6's - unless you play Black Powder, of course, in which case you probably do.

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  3. In CCA there a specific leader symbol on the dice, which we christened "helmets". So double helmets to kill a leader (or just one if he is on his own).

    As for computer assisted wargames...

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    1. Double helmets = kaput. Good.

      I've had a few posts in the past on use of computers to manage games - there are some things that work well with computers, and they can be useful for solo gaming. I maintained a set of computer-driven Napoleonic rules for about 10 years, and they worked pretty well; they also encouraged me to put far more concealed complexity into the game than humans would be prepared to tolerate or even remember. They also, though, distract from the tabletop unless you have a dedicated operator (not a popular role), and the examples of commercial games I've tried - notably Iron Duke and Follow the Eagles - are pretty horrible - entirely because most programmers cannot think beyond the sort of classic Windows GUI which is normal protocol in the office (accountancy packages, everything else you can think of), with a mouse, lists to select from, radio buttons to click on, all that, but completely unsuitable for a physical, visual game involving social interaction.

      My gripe with introducing phones into wargames has more to do with the phones themselves - it's simply yet another excuse to twiddle with the phone. Life is full of these excuses - in fact there is a whole industry dedicated to inventing more of them. It is an absolute no-hoper that the players would not be checking their texts and their email during the game, not to mention receiving and making calls.

      Courtesy and good manners have taken a hammering with the coming of the iPhone. If someone checks his texts while I am talking to him about something then - unless he has excused himself first, because he has some important message coming - my instinct is to throw his f***ing phone out of the window, which, of course, would not be too polite either. Everything slides downhill.

      It is a little oblique, but I am reminded of a friend who, many years ago, gave up cigarettes after a long addiction, and commented to me that he suddenly found he had another hand. He could do all sorts of things - some of which even required two hands - amazing. The number of people - especially women - who constantly have a phone in one hand as they walk about is depressing, and frequently quite dangerous. Not to worry. Progress, you know. This is, as my son keeps intoning, the Twenty First Century. This means that we have to be constantly distracted by the need to check to see if we have had a response to some other completely pointless and valueless text we sent to somebody a few minutes ago. All paralyzed with fear that we might miss something, or might be considered rude if we fail to respond immediately.

      As I intone back to my son, this appalling distraction and unproductive waste of time is something that none of us - especially industry - can afford. We are also developing a complete generation of kids who cannot communicate face to face or form proper relationships. If we make it into the Twenty Second Century we'll be very lucky.

      I must get my medication...

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  4. Another enjoyable morning coffee read Tony. I guess it's bit like the random dice throw thing in the Vassal version of C&CN, which is actually quite an enjoyable way to play the game for those of us sad individuals lacking real life opponents. But I too like a nice proper dice collection, even if I don't use them!

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    1. Morning Lee - the Vassal thing is a complete alternative platform for the game - thus the automated dice are part of the same presentation - all on the same screen. That makes sense. The problem with any kind of off-line device is that we have to shift attention from where the action is to where the device is and back again. This also explains why my attempts to have all dice-rolling take place on a side table (to keep things tidy, and protect the bayonets) is not so good; players (including me) like to roll the dice right next to the melee they are resolving - it somehow keeps the whole thing more immediate!

      The most successful offline device is the human umpire, who can tell us outcomes and shout instructions without interrupting the flow!

      I'm not going to mention the size of my own dice collection. It is, of course, made even worse by multiple sets of 5mm mini-dice.

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  5. Dice, dice, DICE! Hahahahahahahahaha. . .

    Best Regards,

    Stokes (aka Diceman)

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    1. Oh - that's all right then - that's a much more reasonable view! Roll on, Diceman.

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    2. Apropos of nothing I merely throw this into the discussion...

      http://www.wizards.com/dnd/dice/dice.htm

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    3. Thanks very much - you could set up an Excel spreadsheet to do the same job, I guess. The Auditor's Revenge?

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  6. I can only add that apps and smartphones are yet another attempt by IT people to ascribe the description 'engineer' to what they actually do. PAH! I say.
    Bring back steam engines and wooden dice. Ok, I'll allow plastic - but none of this new fangled 3d printed stuff.

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    1. There is much in what you say - the developers are just trying to milk yet more money out of the gullible saps who buy this stuff, and who pride themselves on being "tech savvy". The other day I saw a video clip of a musical concert, and everyone was standing on their seats, so their smartphone movies of the show would not be obscured by the other prats further forward, who were already standing on their seats so that their movies of the show would not be obscured by..... etc. Did they think of this bizarre behaviour all by themselves, or is there some kind of evil script somewhere?

      The most tragic indictment of the smartphone mentality was the legendary selfie of a girl in the US who fatally crashed her car when she lost control of it while taking a selfie. Now that really is an epitaph for the end of commonsense. Look at me (no - not her - me) - I am a star - I live and die on the tiny screen, to impress my friends. Oops - crash.

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  7. That Donkey looks like quite the smartass, you know! :-)

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    1. Hee haw, hee haw - he halways looks like that.

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